Relaxed Social Interaction

This weekend I was one of ten people interacting in an enclosed space. The people were male and female, teenage and 60+, and urban and rural. The space was a room in a traditional cottage. The room was 12ft by 13ft4 (366cm x 409cm).

Normally I have all the space to myself except that it is filled with electromagnetic waves carrying messages. The good news is that my sense organs cannot perceive them without the aid of electronic gadgets such as radio and mobile phone; and there are the options of not owning or at least not using the technology.

When I am by myself it is relatively easy to be mindful of my mental churn or at least those parts that appear in consciousness. When in a group of nine other people there is the churn of nine other mindbrains to consider. This requires social skills; and there is the option of adopting a more or less proactive or reactive role.

I am minded of the social interaction analysis tools that we used for training advisors in Lesotho. A group would be interacting and the advisors would observe and record what was going on. Various checklists were used to record how often, and in what ways, the individuals in the group participated. The results were used in various ways with the overall purpose of enabling the trainee advisors “to see ourselves as others see us” and therefore to be more skilful when interacting in groups.

At the weekend meeting I had no particular agenda. I was content to passively follow the flow that was generated by other group members; and to listen rather than to talk. I noticed with an element of pleasure that ‘I’ no longer feel the urge to be proactive and take the lead.