How far back in time do my memories stretch and how detailed
and accurate are they?
I ask because I am presently reading The New Scientist
(2015) The Human Brain: The New Scientist: The Collection. One of its many
short essays by cutting edge scientists deals with the notion of an
autobiographical memory. The point of having such a ‘thing’ is to ensure that
your various present needs are quickly and efficiently met. ‘Truth’ is neither
a useful nor a necessary concept given that the debate about ‘reality’ is
ongoing.
The major locations in my story are set out on the following
chronological table which also indicates my age in the various places
|
Date
|
Locations
|
My age
|
|
1949 – 60
|
11 years in Buckie
|
11
|
|
1960 – 67
|
07 years in Portsoy (+ Cullycan)
|
18
|
|
1967 – 72
|
05 years in Aberdeen (+ Cullycan)
|
23
|
|
1972 – 74
|
02 years in Edinburgh
|
25
|
|
1974 – 76
|
02 years in Jamaica (6 month travel)
|
27
|
|
1977 – 79
|
03 years in Zambia
|
30
|
|
1979 – 81
|
02 years Reading Univ + teach at Buckie + retreat
|
32
|
|
1981 – 85
|
04 years in Sudan
|
36
|
|
1985 – 87
|
03 years Sussex Univ + teach at Keith + retreat
|
39
|
|
1988 – 92
|
04.5 years in Belize
|
43
|
|
1992 – 95
|
03 years in retreat (Howling Shed and Toonloon Tunes)
|
46
|
|
1995 – 98
|
03 years in Lesotho
|
49
|
|
1998 – 1999
|
01 year retreat – publish two albums of songs
|
50
|
|
2000 – 2004
|
04 years freelancing (join Sangha 30 Oct 2004)
|
54
|
|
2004 – 2016
|
12 years retreat (Parkinson’s diagnosis 27 Oct 2010)
|
65
|
I would have reached early maturity when I was a 25 year old
science teacher in Edinburgh. As far as I remember it was on a whim that I
applied for the job in Jamaica. But the Caribbean did not feel like another
culture so I had a go in Zambia where I began to be interested in the concept
of ‘development’. So I took some time out for thought before a four year stint
in the South Sudan and then more time out before the 4.5 year stint in Belize.
Then time out for private study before 3 years in Lesotho and a move to short
contract work which was part contributor to my burnout and retreat from paid
work.
I was diagnosed as having Parkinson’s Disease on 27 October
2010 and fairly soon after settled on a daily medication of Madopar (5x62.5mg)
and Ropinerole (8mg). At my recent annual meeting with the neurology specialist
(Dr Calum Duncan) I mentioned increasing problems with (a) fine motor control
of my hands, (b) speech (softness and stuttering) and (c) a tendency to
salivate. He recommended doubling the dose of Madopar – in steps of 62.5mg per
week. I am now at the end of week three and there might be improvements in
typing and in playing the guitar.
It is not easy figuring the agencies that shape the
operations of the mindbrain. They include PD and its medication; mindfulness
and enculturation into aspects of cognitive and affective behaviour based upon
nature (instincts, intuitions, biases etc) and nurture (education,
enculturation and brain washing). It is very rarely that the mood for
autographical memories arises. I tend to inhabit the here and now.
But I have journals/diaries and a lot of letters from and to
me going back to the sixties. There are also photos and slides. So I can muster
hard evidence about what I was thinking and feeling in times past. But I rarely
bother to do so.
The stories would be about work, play and people in a variety
of times and places. Music and ideas. Meditation and Retreats. War and civil
unrest. Friends and family. The tropics. And moving on through existential soft
rock to changing minds.
AHA – I came across a comprehensive, factual list of my experiences
as a musician from the 60s till the end of 2003 – “Bursts of the musical muse”.
But it is a list rather than literature. Does this count as autobiography?
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